Unsure about what this post is called....

Today was a tough day because firstly I practiced the new marcages moves from yesterday, trying my best to perfect them before the lesson, and then in the lesson there was another new move involving tacon planta and golpe stamps to an 'el paso' rhythm.

This was so hard to get my head around, as it needs to be fast to go in time with the music and I can barely do it slowly as my head seems to be elsewhere with all of the other arrangements for filming to make, meeting film-makers and also am I going to perform this piece in front of an audience or alone? My head needs space to think about all of this and time is short.

Essentially for this move, at times Toni said my stamping technique was good but then other times, not so good, as at times the golpes and planta's weren't strong enough, and then my timing would be out and then I would just forget the step. I needed to relax. Control my body, putting all the weight in the abdomen, but not be so tense. How do I shake away this tenseness though?

Its a lot to take in. But I am feeling like I've taken huge steps, so to speak, since last week. Having the basics as the foundation for this choreography and practicing intensely has been good for speeding up the process.

I think this says loads about the learning process when we're older. Young people learn without any inhibitions or any strategy in a way. As an 'older' learner, I tend to have to be more methodical about how I get from A to B.

After the class, I went along to my friend's practice space and actually felt so much more confident in myself practicing in front of people. I realised that this is a good thing that people are around, so that I can shake off that ego and shyness. A dramatic shift in what I was feeling last week.

So now I'm here, blogging away and need to mention that this is really an amazing process and experience. Flamenco is very in the moment. I'm unsure yet as to what the outcome will be, but, as with the dance itself, I need to stay in the moment and focus on the here and now and the priorities.

And at this moment, with what feels like a storm in the air, I need to figure out a way of shaking the sore throat that I can feel coming on. Nothing can get in my way of learning this dance now, surely?

This project has been supported using public funding by Arts Council England

Lesson 9 Toni's Interview

Will you do the Fandango?

Amazing lesson today. Really amazing!

We started to think about choreography to the 'El Embrujo del Fandango' for my level - which lets face it, is very very basic. But we started nevertheless.

The music is very complex in a 12 beat rhythm like some of the Bulerias I've been practising with anyway. Still its going to be very hard to keep up with it.

I just feel so excited and happy that I'm onto the actual choreography for this. Not because I want to rush this. I understand wholeheartedly that I have to 'feel' flamenco. Its just great to be working on this part of the process. Carmen Amaya style.

Make no mistake that I am 100% aware of 1) The hard work this is going to take and 2) That I am Clare Brumby, not Carmen Amaya!

Anyway, Toni came up with two marcages moves to try as part of this choreography, similar to what I've been learning through the basics these last couple of weeks although now the style for the arms is in an aldo (?) style - almost bull-like in the way they are positioned, a true Carmen Amaya style.

It was great to get started but hard because of the new arm positions and having to control the arms to stay stable and central whilst doing planta in front and bringing it back, whilst rotating the shoulders so that the arms / shoulders rotate forward with each opposite stamp.

The second marcages was equally confusing for me because it was doing planta to the side, not too wide, just a middle step, arms up high in aldo, and rotating the shoulders corresponding with the side the feet are moving. it also involved a head movement to the left and right - which we had a good laugh at because I always look to the side and not the floor to the corner but down - just slightly!

I have to feel these moves to feel what Amaya was saying really. In fact Toni mentioned that about flamenco later when I asked him about my progress. Because flamenco is a mixture of technique and opening up of the heart. You have to feel it.

So I have loads of questions for myself at this point now. Am I feeling flamenco and how can I possibly feel it more? I'm not here to dilute or disrespect the dance by getting a fast track through this medium. That's impossible. I'm here to try and understand more in a way what Amaya was saying in her performances.

Creatively, how am I going to get through this now starting from scratch? What do I need to be thinking of in terms of what the final piece is going to look like? How do I want this to be filmed. I need to know the answers to these questions pretty quickly because it will impact upon the actual choreography in some way. Can the process of the choreography and practice influence the outcome of the final performance?

Lesson 8

Una especie de avance... (A kind of breakthrough...)

Well, what can I say about today? I was prepared to work and work I did. 4 hours practice in total and muy feliz with the small breakthroughs I'm having.

Firstly, cracked the braccio move with rotating hands and stamps (just about!), though had a hard time learning the new 6th position, but today everybody, I could actually do the tango routine more than once through with more 'rhythmic' hips (as I was still slightly tense in the body). The only problem was that I was a bit too free and easy with the upper body and arms and they were a bit all over the place at times.

I need to control the upper body, but let the hips do have a bit more movement, which is good and you can tell that the practice before the actual lesson is making a huge difference to me picking up the moves, and being slightly more consistent in getting things right. Still need to remember to rotate the hands more in each of the positions where needed though.

Sure, I was making some of the same mistakes, but it all just started to fall into place with determination. Although this isn't comedy, (though some may question that), timing is still everything.

Some of the music I'm learning to is amazing as well. We used a bulerias and soleares bulerias today to learn the braccio moves. Bulerias is a very fast flamenco rhythm using 12 beats (except 11 and 12 are signified by 1 and 2 again when counting) so it was a bit hard going at first but the soleares bulerias was slower and easier to learn with.

I even got the rhythm right for the tango - in time with the 'compas.' But as Toni reminded me, we wouldn't just be using the moves in the order of the routine that I've been practicing. The moves could be used any time.

The stamping was much better and stronger today. Its like I'm taking this all in properly now, just when we're just about to start the Fandango choreography, which is a relief.

I used visualisation to imagine that my body was split into two with my feet connected to the ground and my upper body connected to the sky or being pulled up to the sky. Holding all the weight in my abdomen helped me stay upright and control my body to be able to gain that security. I should feel the stamp in my abdomen and by using these techniques I did. It just made the stamps so much more stronger and made me feel more grounded and safe when stamping.

Love doing the planta tacon, tacon planta tacon and the planta tacon golpe golpe, started gathering speed - though I was quite tired by the end of the session. Its just about continuing to get up the speed and maintain the technique with these things.

After the session, I was on a high and continued to practice in my friends place, mostly the new 6th position which did slowly come to me. Whether its right is another matter. I'll find that out tomorrow.

A good day's work I'd say. Not perfect, but lots of improvement.

I really have loved today. Lots of sweat and pushing myself out of my comfort and confidence zone, but no pain, no gain. Lets see what tomorrow brings with the start of this Fandango. Eek!

Confianza!

Bon dia!

So, for those of you new to the blog, I've been in Barcelona for 2 weeks now, trying to learn flamenco in order to film some final performance based upon Carmen Amaya's performance 'El Embrujo del Fandango', and learning lessons about how I learn, how I work and mostly how I react to challenges!

Learning this dance is part of a wider project challenging ideas of gender roles and identity and 2 weeks ago, on my arrival to Catalunya, my expectations where that I would have been able to take in the basics of flamenco a lot more naturally and easily. 2 weeks on, that may be questionable, but I'm having a go and learning so much about the things that impede my art practice, and indeed life.

Its hard enough getting a project off the ground in the UK, but its more more intimidating trying to organise things in another language, but I've got a great teacher, who's English is actually pretty good, I just feel sorry for him having to think in Spanish but communicate in English and also because he can see where I'm going wrong with the movements, but doing them right can only come from me.

Anyway, whilst trying to get to sleep last night I realised that this whole process of learning has been about confidence, which is what the overall project is essentially about. How do I bring out that confidence though the learning process 1) in myself and 2) in the people I'm collaborating with?

Back to mastering the mind and today is another day.

Real Lesson 7